I was watching the Jazz game the other night and I had an interesting thought, is Jarron Collins a remote control mannequin? Let’s look at some facts:
1. Runs very slowly and like a robot. If I were a mannequin I wouldn’t be fast at all and my body wouldn’t look smooth when I ran.
2. Falls over when bumped. Mannequins get knocked over all the time. Collins falls over when the wind blows in an attempt to get a charge called.
3. Can’t catch a pass. Mannequins are notorious for having terrible hands and not being able to catch. If you haven’t found this out yet, then play catch with a mannequin and see how they do.
4. Nobody plays defense on him. Collins gets the ball and teams treat him like the plague. They are praying for him to shoot it. Mannequins aren’t good shooters at all.
5. He can’t jump. Literally I don’t think that Collins can jump. Mannequins are horrible jumpers. Collins gets a rebound a game or so and that’s because the guy running the remote control on him gets lucky.
As you can see I’ve clearly proven that Jarron Collins is indeed a mannequin. You will start to notice that some other NBA players might be mannequins also and together we can blow the lid on this thing. I’ve had similar thoughts about Jason Collins on the Nets and Michael Doleac.
Filed under: 1, Player Complaints
[...] 3. Collins is really a Mannequin See earlier post. Click here. [...]